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OP here. I should also note that the turd (or 'dot') to the right slowly traveled south at one point, so if the character makes sense with that dot lowered in relation to it, then this may be vital information.

What a terrible picture quality. Not legible. You'll have to take actual photo of your dump.

>>1410959
The dump is now flushed and no longer among us. It had been added to after this character appeared, sinking everything to the bottom in an illegible mess. If there was a message, it was fleeting. And possibly all the more important.

9/10

I actually laughed a little bit.

The message is now lost forever. And it's all your fault.

This thread is actually funny or am I drunk?

I should also note that this is how the dump appeared to me from my seated position. If I were standing and looking down, it'd have been from another perspective. I've attached a picture of four possible viewing angles, if this changes things.

>>1410973
Not true! As soon as I saw it I quickly spread my legs and transcribed it. Once my business was done, I MS Painted this transcription for /jp/ ... there's no chance of memory distortion of the image.

>>1410979
よ

>>1410989
You shit greeted you. It probably wanted to talk about a lot of things. But you flushed it.

>>1410989
Somewhat close, if we're using the seated angle once the 'dot' moved southward. Do you know what this symbol means? Is it a word, a syllable?

>>1410993
It means yo.

>>1410991
Man, and I am honoring that by trying to decipher its message. If I determine that this dump actually does communicate something, I will be sure to view all of my dumps with a new reverence.

Oh I hope he doesn't become the next prophet, using his ass like that.

>>1410998
Ah, the spiritual aspect of dumps, you have reached another level of enlightenment I see.

Patron Saint Ciel

>>1410979
占

If you squint a bit.

>>1410997
Thanks! That'd be kind of awesome... and such a greeting would be completely in character for my shit. Now to determine if it was a cordial 'Yo' or an attention getting 'Yo' ... perhaps it's trying to warn me of something?

>>1411006
Hm, and what does this one mean? I'm considering all possibilities. I mean, our letters didn't come out perfect the first time we wrote them in school, right?

>>1411009
Too late to find out now. You flushed it, asshole.

>>1411009
Any other descriptions or noteworthy things? It may well be a message for you to share and for all of us to know.

>>1411012
Divination.

>>1411012
It's not used alone, but 占い means fortune-telling. ``uranai''

>>1411016
I'm assuming that each dump communicates one idea. To get the next bit of information, I have to wait for the next dump. So once the character was viewed, there was nothing further for that dump to say.

>>1411012
Fortune telling.
Its a sign. Talk to someone, take a dump and see if you predict their fortune.

Yes, did the turd have anything special inside it? How much corn could you spot in it? Was the texture rough? Did it taste like anything familiar? We need to know everything, OP!

>>1411017
All I can say is it wasn't a very pleasant dump, nor was it terrible. I ate a large amount of Hawaiian pizza yesterday.

looks to me like your diet is somewhat lacking. please learn how to properly eat to maximize your digestive help!

>>1411025
>>1411021
I always knew my ass was destined for great things.

It is either a T or a J.

I'm going to save this thread afterwards

>>1411027
There was nothing special inside of it. It was somewhat smooth, but rougher at the ends and rough in patches near the bends. The odor was strong.

10/10 will laugh at it again. Archive it on 4chanarchive?

>>1411045
Could you describe the odor? Did it bring up any sort of memories?

>>1411049
It's already being archived, but not where you're looking.

>>1411045
>It was somewhat smooth, but rougher at the ends and rough in patches near the bends.

Looks like you're going to live a good life.

>>1411052
The archive is down, actually.

>>1411030
My diet has been odd as of late. Before the Hawaiian pizza, I had a bacon cheeseburger, waffle fries, and a banana smoothie for breakfast. The night before, a sirloin steak and potatoes. For lunch that day, sushi (eel, yellowtail and scallion, and Philadelphia rolls) with cold sake.

>>1411045
This means that the beginning and ends will be tough, as well as any strange turns your life takes, but overall you will live a healthy life.

>>1411045
J-Just like mine... I feel closer to messiah!

Ciel-senpai will be proud of you, OP.

>>1411056
Oh wow, you're right. Shit.

>>1411050
The odor wasn't terrible. Like, if I was on a first date and made that smell I'd feel embarrassed, but if it was a lady I'd already slept with and spent some time around I'd feel a bit more emboldened and just laughingly warn her. It hung around the bathroom for about ten minutes. It didn't bring up any specific memories. I was completely in the moment.

>>1411070
Your shit is trying to break the ice, OP.

>>1411072
We have had a rocky relationship this past year. Patches of excellent shitting, patches of horrible shitting... like, soupy pudding dumps taken in public places, in which I barely was able to hold it in long enough to make it. Perhaps this is a turning point for us?

>>1410954
Although it looks like fu a bit, it's clearly korean, dumbass.

I took a shit the other day that was literally pure black. It was kinda creepy.

You know what I hate the most? When my wife changes her tampon and forgets to flush, then I lift up the toilet while half asleep and it looks like someone murdered a rat in there.

>>1411069
Damn, I hope it goes back up soon.

>>1411099
I'm going to have to disagree. If there was a complete circle of dung separate from the main body of the character, it'd be Korean beyond a doubt. But this is not present.

>>1411102
Actually, it's up again!

Thanks for your request.
It has been added to our database and the thread will be archived as soon as enough request for that thread have been made.
This thread has been requested 2 times now.

>>1411101
Pure black? That means that making any new business deals this month would be inauspicious.

>>1411065
Although your dump was taken in a separate toilet than that of the messiah's, in a short time they will link up in the greater body of water of the ocean. They will rejoin. Together as everything, together as nothing. Although we take on separate bodies in this life, our spirits come from the same eternal flame.

>>1411108
Down for me. You aren't talking about 4chanarchive, are you?

>>1411134
oh boy oh boy!

>>1411137
I just requested this thread on it.

>>1411137
>>1411108
>>1411102
>>1411069
I tried really hard to find that ``talking about penises'' picture from /a/, but couldn't find it. How sad.

>>1411111

Dang, and I finally have the capital for a new business venture, too.

>>1411137
Yes. 4Chan Archive seems to be going online and offline every few minutes. There are presently three requests for this thread.

>>1411134
oh shi-

looks like devanagari व

Damn it, you fucking jew!

To think that i believed you..!

Oh god how can this be happening?

Hey guys. I was playing Touhou 7 when suddenly I had to take a shit. I had to choose between continuing to play Touhou or taking a shit. In the end I decided to take a shit. Guess which one was better?

The shit obviously.

It was one of those smooth shits. The kind that just slides out. It was pretty big too. Now I know why females like big cocks so much. If getting your vag00 pounded by a cock is anything like taking a shit, bigger is definitely better.

>>1411145
Save the capital until your dumps turn to a more earthen hue.

>>1411134

>>1411157
It's working fine on my end.

poop 0wns

Taking such a dump means one has attained mu.

>>1411146
Only one more request needed!

>>1411153
Good call! Any specific character?

Thanks for your request.
It has been added to our database and the thread will be archived as soon as enough request for that thread have been made.
This thread has been requested 5 times now.

Congrats, your request has just triggered the archival process for thread 1410954

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>>1411134
>>1411134
The river flows into the ocean, and turns to waves. Waves, surging and receding, without end. Our lives are like the waves. We live, we die, we are reborn.

Soon your father's body will be a silent corpse. But, like the waves, my life will not end. Like the waves, your father will travel to the shore of the next life. His body may die, but his life is eternal.

Our lives are indestructible. Immortal! Though waves break and blood flies, never shrink. Though my body falls, never quail. Though my eyes shut, my lips close... do not fear.

In that world of rebirth, I'm still your father. In that world and all worlds, you are my son! We are father and child! Forever!

>>1411242

>>1411286
fuck, circled the wrong one

>>1411277
Classic quote for a classic dump. I never knew shitting was so spiritual. Until now.

Until now.

>>1411300
Awesome. And do you know what it means, by any chance? I feel that this has import for us all.

む

>>1411318

Devanagari is an alphabet. It doesn't carry any meaning by itself any more than the latin alphabet does.

From WP: "Devanāgarī (देवनागरी, pronounced /ˌdeɪvəˈnɑːɡəriː/ in English[1]), or Nāgarī, is an abugida alphabet of India and Nepal. It is written from left to right, lacks distinct letter cases, and is recognizable by a distinctive horizontal line running along the tops of the letters that links them together. Devanāgarī is the main script used to write Hindi, Marathi, and Nepali."

>>1410954
Your dump cured my arthritis! And at the same time it made me understand that my wife has not been adulterous, despite my long, unspoken feelings. Tonight I'll push the beds back together so we can sleep like a couple. It's been seven years!

>>1410997
"Yo!"

I bet this is how all of Alf's dumps looked.
(Pardon my sacrilige.)

Hey /jp/, OP here again. I took another dump, many hours after the original post. Once again, I've transcribed it. Does this character mean anything?

This is the chance for us to determine if my ass actually is communicating, and perhaps a holy prophet.

>>1412890
\
:

>>1412890

it means you should start eating more fiber

And the two together, if it means anything combined.

>>1412927
Look like a face with a huge tear drop and two moles.

>>1412927
I see a baby elephant.

I have a feeling that I'm going to go mad trying to crack this, like the dude from 'Pi.'