4chanarchive

PhillyBoyXNH is a 26 year old, straight male from Philadelphia. We are 99% enemies. That is a full 3% ahead of the second most opposing result, out of all people on OKC. Let's look a little at this man.

His name is Xander. Already he is archrival material. He supports college football. His interests include 1984 and Linkin Park. And this little number:

You should message me if:
massage? sweet! oh... message... nevermind...

...seals the deal.

What follows is our first correspondence.

Xander, let us do battle.

"Dear Adversary,
My name is Jason. I am a 23 year old male, self-employed in South London, and I am going to fight you until one of us is dead.
You don't know me, but that does not seem to have stopped you opposing me in all endeavours. I dread to think what clandestine activities you've enacted in the background to earn your 99% enemy rating - I have had a lot of cancelled dates lately, and the cold tap has been running warm you bastard - but this cannot continue.
Please do my the favour of levelling with me. It's all too easy to play dumb, to spout the obvious "I don't know you", "I have never been to your continent", "There is no reason or possible way that I would ever delay every train you ride". These claims demean us both. Laugh, Xander. Laugh maniacally. Don your outfit - if such things aren't beneath such a criminal genius as yourself - and have a jolly good laugh.
Because the time for laughter is over.
I'm coming.

Genially yours,
Your Enemy."

I await his reply.
Now go! And seek your foe.

I really really really like where this is going. :D

I don't use this cupid bullshit... but please, proceed.

Who else has a deep fear that the OP is going to be contacted by Interpol soon?

this could get really interesting really fast.
God i hope he talks shit to you...

>>7062190
>>7062183
>>7062161

I'll make another thread if/when I get a reply

Idiot you shouldn't alert your enemy that you are going to kill them. That's how... oh shit you are the evil one! Thats how the evil guy's plans in cartoons always get failed!

Seriously, just don't gloat. Find him and destroy him!!!!

While the idea of finding your total opposite on OkCupid, that message you sent is fucking gay. You talk like the bad guy from a crappy anime. Mister Xander from Philadelphia will probably write the message off as a stupid nerd doing stupid shit, which is exactly what this is.

So here lies the cause of all my misfortune. To confront her like this after so much time wasted seeking her in the shadows I now know what I must do.

Wink at her or summat? lol i dunno.

>>7062209

No! It... it CAN'T be...
Nooooo!

>>7062211

Leave him alone, douche.

>While the idea of finding your total opposite on OkCupid,

wat

>You talk like the bad guy from a crappy anime

I do not think you get humour

>>7062211

nofunallowed.jpg

faggotblock

>>7062212
Why would you even use OKC if you're seeing someone?

i like where this is going.. post moar.

>>7062211
Err.. I can't help but notice..
>While the idea of finding your total opposite on OkCupid, that message you sent is fucking gay.
While the idea of finding your total opposite on OKCupid is WHAT?

Anyways, I just messaged mine. I can't help but chuckle over the fact that my first bit of revenge over his misdeeds takes part in him eagerly checking his mail, thinking that some hot young girl who likes to be called sugartits and wants his hard cock just messaged him. He'll be drooling slightly, his eyes glazed over from desire. Then he'll see my mug, and a warning of imminent battle should he stray across the thin, thin state line that divides us.

>>7062212

Nice filename, haha.
Just let them know you're going to be enemies from now on. That you're sewing them a supervillain costume and they can wear it if they like, and that all they really need to give you is their measurements.

>>7062233

That is brilliant. Post the message!

>>7062230
Because I'm single and she is obviously my mortal enemy. And I mean, they make the top 10 cute couples of TruLove magazine??
I have serious doubts about the authenticity of that periodical.

>>7062240
I'm warning you, knave. I know what you are up to, and should you ever cross my path, we will have to level this, and it may not be pretty. You stay on your side of the border, and I'll stay on mine. Truce?

>>7062246

Pretty good, but 'truce'? Really, already?
You totally want to lay your nemesis, don't you!

>>7062246
There is no room for truces in a battle that has raged for eons and will continue to when both our corpses are naught but rotting dust.

HAVE AT YOU!

I support your endeavour whole-heartedly, OP

This is him guys. This is him, hailing from Tucson Arizona, and fitted in all the hideous cowboy attire you've never seen. Apparently he would like to live off the land and has an interest in "polotics". He's also quite interested in casual sex and rock climbing. All a facade obviously, he's been provoking me since day 1.

>>7062260

That is fucking perfect. He already has a character. "The Bandit", you can call him. Or "Six-shooter"

"Bronco Pete".

>>7062260
Holy fuck, I already found my nemesis and I still want that cunt dead.

How do I find my enemie?!

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/i_am_lovely_laf?cf=regular

>>7062275
>>7062271
I also forgot to mention, he shares his full name on his profile. Dylan McDermott. The name alone is grounds to pursue him.

>>7062283

>Enjoying my time outside of work to the max
You are enemies with the year 1995.

>>7062295

Going to message him?

0% Match
4% Friend
99% Enemy

Avid roleplayer. She goes on to describe what her character is up to, in detail. Lives on the other side of the world, in a relationship, and pregnant.

Guys...

I think I want to date my archenemy.

>>7062233

>hot young girl
>sugartits

link?

I have a few at 99%, but this one particularly seems like a villain to me. He even has a costume.

>>7062309
*I was wrong about the name, it's Nolan McDermott, not Dylan.
Anyways I messaged him.

It has come to this Mr. McDermott. Do not even try to pretend you're in disagreement with this fate. It has been you, and you alone, Mr. McDermott that has forced this to happen. Every tragedy, every heartbreak, every missed opportunity, you were behind it, snickering and plotting more. Well Mr. McDermott I tell you this, I've had enough. Prepare to meet your match sir, pistols high noon.

>>7062374

Nice. That's what he wears when he steals letters from you.

I need better enemies. My tops are two guys who both work at Staples and LOVE sushi. I never realized those two things would be my downfall...

Can someone please provide a link to this quiz thing?

what scares me the most about this woman is that she is STRAIGHT. yer i know. she's got a dick, i'm sure of it.

25/f/richmond virginia. she's apparently random, interesting and exciting. OOOOOOOOO

This thread is fucking hilarious, and the exact opposite of what we need from all those OKC threads nowadays.

Keep it up, OP.

>>7062430
I think she's dead.


But I'd hit it.

>>7062135

Oh, God, this is amazing. Please keep us updated.

Do I have to sign up to OKC to do the match test?

>98% enemy
>2% friend

He doesn't seem like a bad guy, we just have zero interests in common.

>>7062255
You catch more flies with honey than vinegar, my friend.

Ok, so I made an okcupid just so I can find my nemesis.

Here's to hoping I can duel him someday.

i have never wanted to join a dating site before today

thank you OP, perhaps - should i win - this will be the end of all my thwarted plans

My "nemesis" is a pretty cool college junior from Ohio in a related field of study. I call bullshit.

>>7062421

Wow. You have a team of enemies. They actually needed to band together to take you down.
The Sinister Twins.

>>7062526
So I found my nemesis. This is him. He lives in Tuscon, now known as the home of /r9k/'s arch-rivals. I bet his name is John, or Bill, or Derrick. I'll go with Derrick.

Derrick here is studying Finance in the University of Arizona. And he has been thwarting my plans ever since I have been born. I also think Derrick is buddies with Buffalo Bill here >>7062260
In fact, I think they might be partners in crime.

My god, Anon. We must band together against our nemeses!

>>7062505

You clever devil.

>>7062469

Yes, and fill out lots and lots of questions

(1/2)

98% - bropocalypse

>>7062638
2/2
99%

What do we have here?

CUTE ASIAN CHICK? WTF?

>>7062649
Think about it.

You are a virgin because of a combination of cockblockers and KAWAII DESU NE~^-^ girls.

It's a conspiracy.

oh my god i already hate him

99% enemies. She's a 21 year old, five foot, unwed, single-mother from "dA iLan'Z". As far as I can tell, her self-summary seems to be a defensive rant full of jibberish aimed at those, I can only assume to be my predecessors that have failed where I shall succeed.

EVRYONES GOTZ DER OWN PERSONAL PROBLEMS THEY JUSS NEED 2 LEARN HOW 2 STAY AWAY 4RM MINE ALREADY CAUSE IM DONE WIT ALL DAT HE SAID SHE SAID DRAMA DATS LIL KID %#&@$! SO ALL U %#&@$!ES OUT DER NEED 2 STOP RUNNING UR FUKN MOUTHS & GROW UP ALREADY...WELL DERS NOT MUCH MORE 2 SAY ABOUT ME I THINK U ALL KNOW WATS UP ALREADY & IF U DONT JUSS HIT ME UP I'LL LET U KNOW & IF UR ONE OF MA HATIN AsS %#&@$!ES GET DA FUK OFF MY PAGE I DONT KNOW WAT UR DOIN WASTIN UR TIME ON My PaGe IN DA 1ST PLACE I ThOuGhT i MaDe iT cLeAr ALrEaDy..BUT THN AGAIN I GUESS IM WORTH DAT MUCH OF UR TIME HUH STUPID %#&@$!ES!!SToP FuKn TrYn AlReAdY & GeT A fUkN LiFe & SToP WoRriN AbOuT MiNe U CaN HaTe ALL U WaNt BuT i'LL GuArAnTeE 1 THiNg iT AiNt GoNnA GeT U NoWhEre So iF i WeRe U I'D Do MySeLf A fAvOr & SToP WhiLe Ur AhEaD!!! I DONT GIVE ANYONE A REASON TO HATE ME...THEY CREATE THEIR OWN LITTLE DRAMA OF PURE JEALOUSY!!!

>>7062631

Man, that guy's big. He's a brawler, thug kind of enemy.
I bet he wears a Rhino costume.

You're gonna need to train like Batman here to tackle him

>>7062663

Jesus fucking God, man. Your foe is illiteracy itself.

>>7062631
I came to the conclusion long ago that the pacific northwest is the most /r9k/ friendly region of america, this thread has taught me that tucson is easily the worst possible place for a robot.

>>7062649
the devil often assumes pleasing forms.

>>7062649

I searched her. Got this.
Which questions have YOU been answering?!

>>7062649
(3/2)

Cute asian nemesis again.

there is all the data she has about you. she is mocking you by keeping it in plain view.

>>7062666
He might be a brute, but that man is a fiend! He is smart, having ruined my plans for years. Think about it. He's barely a year older than me, so he has started his plot to destroy me when he was a baby.

I bet Derrick's an android or something.

>>7062692

You have the only nemesis that you can defeat via hate-fucking.

>>7062660
But I'm not! Though on second thoughts, I never have been able to get asians into bed. Nearly 40 women and not one asian.

This guy is my arch nemesis.

I don't think I should start shit with him.

>>7062705
and why do you think that is? why have no asian women slept with you? because of her.
also
>40 women
lol no lying, its an anonymous board.

>>7062715

OP here. I've slept with more than that.
It may be an anonymous board, but truth's truth.

>>7062705
Conspiracy, man.

Everything is a conspiracy. I know this is true because I have watched that NHK animu.

>>7062712
Looks like he's a general from WW2. He hasn't been messaged for over a week, it'll make his day.

>>7062722
Gentlemen, let us not be distracted of mere worldly pleasures! Alas, have some pomp and pride, for we have assembled in this great thread with a common goal, to defeat our many enemies! Getting off topic is just what they'd want. Take heed dearest friends.

>>7062712

He's your Moriarty. Your Lex Luthor. An actual, bona-fide evil genius.
Not start shit? Feel PRIVILEGED to have an enemy like that, dude.

>>7062715
>>7062733
She's been secretly telling them all about me.

Also not here to argue truth. I was even at UC berkeley for a while and that's like 70% asian and not ONE.

How is this possible? 99% enemies

Indigo01
26/F/London

You should message me if:
you earn lots of money,so u can take me travelling around the world

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

-INAL BATTLE COMMENCE

>>7062787
makes you question your sexuality, doesn't it!

>>7062631
So I found another nemesis of mine. I think he's part of the Islamic MI6.

So, should I message Morad and give him a heads up that I'm coming for him to kill him?

>>7062712
I'd feel the same way man. but look at him.

It's your destiny to battle him.

>>7062791
Take that bitch down.

In later years, Anonymous would look back on this thread as the birth of the OKCupid serial killer that tracked down his antimatches and executed them while wearing a multicolored wetsuit and wrestling mask.

>>7062802
bro...i wouldn't fuck with him, he's smark, he's fuckin smark

>>7062820
I would love to see the Hallmark telemovie of that.

>>7062802
I think you should look for moore.

Once you secure this 'moore', he will be defeated easily.

99% enemy, I read her as being a female copy of me. Sure is self hate in here.

>>7062802
... I was going to message Morad and tell him that his death with come swiftly, then I found this man.

He stole my name.

This is fucking war. He will pay dearly for this.

34 / M / Karachi, Pakistan (7323 Miles)

98% enemies, My new sworn enemy. Paki Gilligan's fate is sealed.

>>7062855

Laughed heartily, at length

>>7062242
>I have serious doubts about the authenticity of that periodical.

I lmao'd.

do I have to register to search my enemy?

>>7062906
Yes. Also you have to answer a few matchmaking questions. Around 25 should do.

>>7062791

Do it faggot. Our prayers are with you. Fuck ugly-average girls asking for money

i am very fond of this thread

>>7062913

meh I can't be bothered really.

0% Match 0% Friend 100% Enemy
petrichoriny
30 / F / straight / Single
Thousand Oaks, California (1165 miles)
>Christianity and very serious about it
Oh I see the problem.

>>7062931
then that means your nemesis has won already.

faggot.

I believe I've found an OKC account w/ no pic, that my girlfriend has set-up. Should I create a phony profile and attempt to set up a meeting?

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Borse?cf=regular

Apparently this guy is my mortal enemy, but he really doesn't seem all that bad.

>>7062954

That seems like the logical course of action.

>>7062883
I'd say I threatened him well enough.

And so my crusade begins.

slightly disappointed by my nemisis

Some old crone from minnesota, not quite Scaramanga

>>7062980

When you were a baby, she was likely a teenager or older.
Since your birth she has plotted your downfall, gradually wearing down at your sanity from a distance - using various human proxies to indirectly grind down your soul.

>>7062989

I now feel better....now you mention it all that has happened in my life..... she's a cunning one no mistake...see the glint in her eyes

>>7062978

We need to have another thread this time tomorrow with the results from today.

>>7062978
My last enemy.

Why does he have to be my enemy? It's such a shame.

Alright. I've decided that I can not right away no matter how formidable my nemesis may seem.

>>7063076

Your job is to protect the pills. Or peels. Pielz. etc

>>7063117
>can not right
>right
>run

He may of already gotten to me robots.

>>7063117

Excellent. Whichever of you may die, it will be honourable.

>>7063126
That man, he is a cunning one...

Also, what happened to the tradition of "HEY NIGGER FUCK YOU?"

Since when did we start making all these drawn out messages to our enemies?

exactly what you would expect.

>>7063153
This is what I want to do to her (I'm Ray, she's the other dude).

>>7063153

I am jealous. To paraphrase The Monarch, "The sweet loathing must just pour out of you whenever you look at her pathetic face"

>>7063153
dammit now that song is stuck in my head.

damn you.

I'm waiting to see some replies.

AHA I FOUND MY ADVERSARY!
I lol'd, please tell me this fucker is a troll

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/tim_carrey?cf=regular

0% Match 0% Friend 98% Enemy
26 / M / bisexual / Single San Francisco, California

You can just call me THE TIM. I'm fucking AMPED. I'm not like the PUSSIES on this site. I'm a fucking MAN and I'm comftorble with my sex, so I don't give a FUCK if you're a guy or a girl.

>>7063202

BULL SHARK TESTOSTERONE

Seriously, though, you're in trouble. How do you kill a man so... amped?

>>7063166
>>7063162
here is my challenge. so it begins...

>>7063218

Subject: Downfall.

nice

>>7063202
sure sounds like one of us

>>7063202

yes, the pic's from a /b/ camwhore from a few years ago.

>>7063218
Were I your adversary I would have chills. Nice.

>>7063202 here
Something seems fishy with the type of rivals I'm getting.

0% Match 0% Friend 98% Enemy
26 / M / straight / Single
Moon, Virginia
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/legadillo?cf=regular

Hey, I'm Todd. I've been living on the moon all my life, but last week, my mom (who's also the head botanist) told me she was sending me back to Earth to get a real earth education and find a wife. HOLY COW, WAS I EVER EXCITED! All my life, I've been staring at that big, blue ball, wondering what it would be like to live there. Sure, I've seen it in pictures and movies, but to actually be on top of the empire state building and standing on the surface without a spacesuit? Why, it's enough to make your head fall off!

My mom is the only lady on the space station, but she's taught me all about how to go on dates. I've also watched plenty of Frank Sinatra and Humphrey Bogart movies, so you'd better believe I know how to treat a lady.

So anyway, I guess I'd just like to meet someone to show me around the planet and maybe come back to the moon with me to have kids and one day populate Mars.

>>7063300
Fuck I'd love to show that fucker around. PICK ME, TODD.

4chanarchive.org request interface!

I'm originally from Tucson, and I can tell you that the above sentiments are quite true: it is indeed a treacherous place hostile to all robots. It is possible that our many devious foes are using it as a base of operations, or at least a rendezvous point.

>My fav movies are Step Up...Booty Call.....Passion of the christ..ect

wtf how can you put etc. with that list of movies?

>>7063495
same girl

>1. My family 2.Celly. 3.lip gloss 4.friends 5.Bible/god 6.sex

>>7062649

wtf... she is so cute that I'm going to die. I want to carry her around in my pocket and make her fight caterpillars.

her picture must be fake. its impossible that she could be single.

Damn, this guy hasn't filled out any info, despite having answered 175 questions.

>>7063412
Hey guys, we need more requests. The first three posts are totally worth it.

>>7063536

>I want to carry her around in my pocket and make her fight caterpillars.

brilliance.

Hey, OP, has your adversary responded to your challenge yet?

>>7063564

requested 3x now.

blox

>>7063578

Nope! We're in completely different time zones, so I can expect a reply later tonight or tomorrow.
Or maybe he's one of the ones who's online every other month.

...Spending the rest of his time designing the architecture of my ruin, no doubt.

My adversaries are all just people I don't want to date, not people who are particularly adversarial.

I had completely forgotten I had an OKC account with some random bird for the profile picture. I think I found her on Flikr, if memory serves.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Corgylegs/ good enough?

I had to check this shit out as I have a genuine account from years ago, before I met my girlfriend. I'll have to try and remember my password to see if I've got an arch enemy waiting. FUCKING BRING IT ON FAGGOTS.

She believes she's lived in Old England and a number of other places. Crazy bitch.

>>7063814
Maybe you should look at the strawberries for a couple seconds before you buy them, you fucking twat.

>>7063824
I pretend to wear Ugg boots too, but you say nothing about that.

Trying to be an online tough guy, d'aw.

>>7063814

The funny thing is you didn't mention their high enemy rating, so reading it must be bizarre and unsettling for them in the absolute

>>7063842
I don't see anything in that message about Ugg boots, but if I did I would have commended you for having excellent taste in boots. Uggs are both stylish and comfortable.

The thing with the strawberries is just fucking pathetic.

Here's my shit: Repostan' from /co/:

I'm doing this!

RIGHT NOW!

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/CoxRocksUrSox?cf=regular

(his profile)

"Dear Sir,

Finally, it has come down to this. I have finally found you- my true enemy. For a long time, I wondered what was going wrong with my life. Things would just go wrong for no apparent reason. But now, I realize who is to blame.

You are. Yes, you, my 100% enemy. My coffee has been too hot lately- I assume that you are the one behind this? And the fact that my hard-drive recently crashed... well, I don't need to say that I'd probably find YOUR fingerprints on it.

No matter. For you see, I have found you. My true enemy. And I come. I come with roll of drum. For you see, there are those who stand in the light and those that walk in the shadow.

Your do-goodery will come to an end.

-Your Arch-villain"

My profile:http://www.okcupid.com/profile/knyaz_s

this is her
oh, wow...

OP here. Keep this alive, yeah?
Back in some hours. off to the ex's for kung fu movies and weed

How do I look for my nemesis?

DAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA

0% Match
2% Friend
97% Enemy

DEAR ENEMY I LIKE THE BEARD ON YOUR NECK. ANY CHANCE YOU ARE A ROWBOAT KTHX

This the best thread I've seen on this board in a long time.

>>7062943
Hah I live right next your enemy. NEXT I TELL HER WHERE YOU INTERNETS

>>7064204
Wow.. I bet you he's been hacking your e-mail for years.

>>7064267

He would if he could tear his fat ass away from Warcraft

>>7062430

My own clone - my nemesis too. Are you me? Or did she clone us?

Holy shit. Original content on /r9k/.

It's so f5ing to finally lol at a thread.

>>7064536
>f5ing
RAGE

Holy fuck my nemesis is one dumb bitch. Look's like a downer too. I should have no problem besting her in mortal combat should she step foot on European soil.

BRITTNEYANDME
28 / F / Straight / Married
Manchester, New Hampshire (3431 Miles)

0% Match
0% Friend
98% Enemy

My favorite books, movies, music, and food
I HAVE NO INTEREST IN READING,I LOVE WATCHING LIFETIME,AND LMN,DR.PHILL,HOME IMPROVEMENT AND MANY MORE.MUSIC I ENJOY ARE BRITTNEY SPEARS,METALICA,GOD SMACK,NICKELBACK,AND MORE.FOODS I LIKE ARE EVERYTHING BUT SEAFOOD.

>>7064586
She will neither understand your message, nor completly read it. Find someone else to startle.

>>7064586

What a terribly bland and unexciting human being.

>>7064586

God damn mouth breathers letting down the side.
See the shit we have to deal with in the UK? Fuck the muzzers, it's the natives that piss me off.

>>7064744


Manchester, New Hampshire bro.
We don't have to put up with that.

>>7064744
>Manchester
>New Hampshire

Not Manchester, Lancashire you dumbfuck.

0% Match 0% Friend 98% Enemy. His name is nobodys80, his own description describes him best.


im a 37 male from the scranton area im new to this site i love to bowl, play darts and go just about any were.im a single father of 4(and dont worry about my ex she moved out of state with some ups guy) friends say im crazy in my own little way

>>7064803

This man is terrifying. You can just SEE there's some underlying problem with this dude. Midlife Crisis: Imminent.

pip pip fuck the muzzers i can't read

>>7064839
Brobots, if my enemy shows up in the newspaper for murder, know that I lost our final battle.

>>7064759

I just read Manchester. :/
I thought the tv was very american for a britfag.

You're all small time

find a 99% enemy that's NEAR you

Not my top Enemy, but certainly mention-worthy

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/mere_bapu?cf=regular

>>7062260
I live in Tucson. I'll find him for you brobot.

>>7065021
>Chicago
>Implying this is difficult in a large city. I live in the middle of nowhere and he's a 98% within easy driving distance.

ReezyB

My favorite books, movies, music, and food
My favorite book in teh world is Of mice and men. My favorite movie....The Goonies lolz. My favorite kind of music is "GOOD" Hip-Hop (J-Dilla, Madlib, M.F Doom etc). My favorite food is uhh psssh duh the kind u eat, haha how tarded can u get.
The six things I could never do without
1. Internet. and yes thats first on the list lol.
2. Women. Gawd i love the ladies cant live with cant live without.
3. Ummm.
4. Knowledge. Cuz knowledge is power.
5. Music. I love music waaaaaaay too much lol.
6. My closest friends.


Yeah that sounds about right

My 100% enemy, http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Mark1616, replied saying only this:

"Question -- are you retarded?"

I fear he does not take he me seriously...

This is what he likes in a woman btw, talk about high standards...

"I'm attracted to attractive, genuine, super cool women who are laid back, interesting with something to say. And definitely must have a sense of humor."

My arch enemy is a 59-year-old widowed man from Missouri.

His name is Paul.

Dude, I had an awesome time finding my arch enemy!

my rival is a 40yr old man from italy

>>7065628

I already regret checking that profile out. He's so terribly witty it hurts.

>>7062131
This is what I sent to my arch nemesis:

Hello,

According to OK Cupid, you are no less than 98 percent my enemy. I suppose this means you're supposed to be my arch enemy.

Since I am in the superhero business, I am certain this would make a successful entrepreneurial deal. I will foil your plans on a timely basis, but will never beat you.

I politely ask you to consider this business proposal.

Yours sincerely,

Ian,
Superhero incoginito

nB.: Sidekicks are allowed, but only if they're less hotter than you. And maybe shorter. Idunno.

Her name is toothpastekisses

I found mine. 0% Match, 0% Friend, 99% Enemy. He's a Catholic Asian living in Salt Lake City, Utah.

"My name is gregory xaythavone and I am 5'8" and athletic. I like to hang out with friends. I am a actor/ model for slc ut. I done some movie and commercial in utah. I am a college student going to go to slcc taking the summer off. I work at a tech support for vizio tv. If you wanna know more about me just ask and I will tell you."

MY ARCH-ENEMY'S NAME IS MR. XAYTHAVONE.

>FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

>>7064536
Bees!
Right?

http://ia-premiu.com/index.php?r=JcNB click here you shouldn't miss that

The website changes the profiles listed, but this one is pretty good.

My nemesis is apparently African mail

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/hardnuts?cf=regular

"i am a married man, living in an open marriage with my wife. at the moment she is not much into sex, she just wants to be laid back. i am just looking for a woman whom i can have short sexual encounters with. i am an african mail and live in dublin. only serious mails will be responded to."

>>7064586
>METALICA
>METALLICA
>SHITTY BAND EITHER WAY
>BUT FUCK
>METALICA

YOU MUST -DESTROY- THIS FUCKING CUNT, ANONYMIGHT!

/r9k, your enemies are smalltime.

I present: a 47 year old female Texan Evangelical. Reading her profile she may just be the enemy of this board in general.

She's religious. She can't be alone. She's not hot.

She's desperate and clingy.

She only graduated from high school, clearly about as smart as most religious nutjobs.

She claims to love music, just nothing of the last 20 years.

She doesn't like cats.

I'm scared. I think she voted for Bush, and that's been her plot to destroy me.

Wow my nemesis is an obnoxious bizzaro world version of myself. He is also a level 80 priest on world of warcraft, like myself.

Heres his picture.

>>7062131
wtf, Im looking for my enemy but people are talking to me.

>>7066338

That looks like a guy I went to school with

...Nick?

>>7066338
if he is the opposite of you, what kinda of fucked up person are you?

>>7065628
Do not be fooled by his cunning ways. He may be trying to lull you into a false sense of security.

Also archive this thread, it has kept me amused all evening

>>7066377

His name on the site is Mustadioilicous

>>7066391

From what I understand, we are both nerds, except he is in the dysfunctional state, whereas I am grounded to the real world. I'm also extroverted, and work out all the damn time.

Have some chick asking me if I want to have fun in IM. I don't like where this is going.

It seems like a tarp.

I love this thread so fucking much. Unfortunately my top enemy is only 92% and has no picture or info whatsoever...

ENEMY THY NAME IS NADIA
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/nadia_pd

>>7066511

try answering more questions, the more you answer the higher the percentages

>>7066565

she also happens to be my enemy(98%) .

so you wanna make out or something?

I've been following this thread and I just can't help it. I have to go find out who my enemy is.

THIS MUST BE OUR FINAL BATTLE!

I have found the source of my misfortune. The final boss. The ultimate evil in my life.

I have found him, and I will now smite him with my righteous hammer of justice. For truly, such a nemesis can not exist.

He is the yin to my yang. The dark to my light. And when we do battle, and I stand victorious over his broken body, I will tear out his heart, and take a bite of it.

>>7066665
...I forgot his picture.

Answering these questions is so gash. But I need to find my enemy. I'll answer 40. That should be enough.

ok folks meet my nemesis, they call him Danny Leics.
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/danny_leics?cf=regular
He's a scary looking guy isn't he? Fate was not kind the day it chose him to be my foe. Now to inform him that I know. Wish me luck /r9k/

>>7062649
Don't be mean to the cute master race girls.ergherg

I found my nemesis and already messaged her.

Sometimes the stars align, and all that is good and wholesome come together. For that light, also comes shadow, evil and deception. I know I have never met you, but lets be honest, we have met. How else can you explain a 98% enemy rating?

Now I know why I trip over my shoe-laces, why I can't find a decent job, or even win at BINGO. You are my shadow, and you have been destroying everything I do.

Well know this! I am getting my battle suit ready. I will make the trip to the frozen tundra of Wisconsin. There you and I shall finally meet and out cosmic battle, between good and evil shall commence. Gird your loins for battle my arch-rival, next time we meet shall be your last.

ps. Foot model? Really!?!

>>7066732
oh yeah sorry the link to her profile is
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Kaltir

>>7066607
You KNOW it.

blockb4youbreakmyheart

>>7066732
God damn, if I were her I would be quite impressed.

>>7065166
he's pretty meh, as I read his profile I just keep thinking "eh could be worse"

>>7066772
I still can't get over this... a fucking foot model... I HATE FEET. Seriously, I might just cut her legs off and show them to her as torture.... Oh shit.. Am I the villan?

>>7065021
I'm in southside chicago, give me more exact co-ordinates and I shall slay this demon for you.

>>7066732

FFFuuuu---

I have a 92% match with her.

I really can't figure out why I'm so highly matched with so many crazy sluts.

>>7066842
No offense, but have you considered that YOU may be a crazy slut? God, keep it in your pants.

>>7065021
A near me enemy?
OH GOD WHAT

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Sonichu

My enemy. I shall defeat him. I shall.

>>7067023
Epic Amulet is Epic

>>7066703
Ok, and here's what I sent him
Greetings.
There is much in the world that is opposite. The heat of summer is opposed by the cold of winter. The light of day by the dark of night. In a similar way, the universe has set us aside to be the contrasting reflection of each other's souls. How else can you explain that of all the people here that you are the one for whom my enemy score is the highest?

Now things are much clearer. You are the one orchastrating the bad things that happen to me. You are the reason I stub my toe on the radiator, why I couldn't find a seat on the bus and even why the reason my computer is running slowly. Does your villainry know no bounds sir?

Well rest assured, that whilst the darkness is strong in you, I am the blazing light of good extinquishing the shadows. The final battle approachs. Lightning will split the skies as we face our destiney. The epic struggle between good and evil - twin sides of the same coin. Just remember, good will always triumph.
Till then sir, I bid you goodbye.

>>7067023
Are you the pickle man?

>>7066155
I... kind of feel sorry for her, actually. She's an eminently pitiable creature.

First one's from Fucking, Austria and there's no info in her profile, nor any German, so I believe it's a troll - that's the reason I screencapped the second one too. A really charming screen name she has. (And let's not get started about the face.)

This thread is full of winbl0x

wow...

My favorite tv shows are UFC, WWE, Lois and Clark: The new adventures of superman.

Im not much of a reader really.

I love country music.

I spend a lot of time thinking about
sports, the past, the future. I try not to think to much about useless things though.

>>7067211

by the way, he was a 100% enemy.

>>7067211
what fag puts "its a hemi" on the bat-mobile?

>>7067023
Your arch enemy recycles his semen....

>>7067396

that kind of fag.

he is 'Fun, here, and tired hahah.'

>>7067465
>>7067023
>>7067039
Jesus christ, how new to the internet are you fags?
http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Cwc

it's a troll profile

Wow.
"I spend a lot of time thinking about:
If Jesus was a Jew, then why am I a Christian....."

I was curious to see who my enemy was and I just got some normal-sounding guy. Bit cocky, but that's not too bad. Meh, was expecting more.

>I am an attractive ambitious loving person who seeks the same in a woman. Also I like women that talk a lot ... anyway give me a call sometime if your a sweet female and you think you have what it takes. 774 287 4601.

>>7067023

NO! Holy shit, he has one! HAHAHAA

>>7062442
I agree


keep going op

45435345435435

>>7067521
I think I have just been trolled.

>>7067676
EXPLAIN RIGHT NOW GOOD SIR

>>7067728
>>7067676
you guys are faggots, see>>7067521

mickey1991 is just a typical Brit, obviously.

The six things I could never do without
1mates 2 mates 3mates 4rugby 5mates 6mums cooking
I spend a lot of time thinking about
life and mates

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Primale?cf=regular

this guy is a massive fag.

>>7062260
I will find him and kill him, if only to rid the world of his horrible attire.
>>7062678
the arid desert heat tends to rust our metal skin, causing major discomfort and irritability.
>>7062631
He looks like he stole all the muscle from Buffalo Bill.

>>7066732
Behold a response from my arch villian !!!!!!

I don't know - I'm pretty sure you must be the one destroying everything I do:-p That or it's a plague of bad luck:-p And yes, I am indeed a footmodel. I started a foot only myspace not too long ago - check it out sometime if you're curious. http://www.myspace.com/iwilldestroyyou

>>7068457
AND I fired back mightily!!

You dare to mock me? I despise feet (likely one of the sources of 99% enemy), were it not for the fact they get us to walk, then I'd cut them off and hover everywhere.

I did think for a time that perhaps I am the evil one, but I knew I wasn't. What gave it away is that you are a woman, and even Christian mythology tells us that Eve reached for the apple first, and in Greek myth, Pandora the box she swore not to open.

When I look in your picture I can see the cunning in your eyes. You are smart, just like my arch-villain should be. You would have me believe that I am just having bad luck, that is exactly what a villain would do.

I mean... did you read your "I am really good at section"? Geeze I can sense the pent up rage from here in a similarly cold New Hampshire. Lastly, you have a child, which is likely a fence for all your dastardly deeds. I am on to you, Miss Wiss (I thought of that myself), or should I say, Kaltir the Destroyer!

Your days of destruction, child rearing, and foot modeling are numbered!

Cpt. Cheebra the valiant.

ps. and seriously a myspace with that kind of name gives you away bigtime!

She's too scary.

So we're bitching at people that are our "enemies" on OKCupid?

Holy shit this thread is still going and I am so very pleased about it :D

>>7068574
she's kinda funny
i lol'd @ demurely puckered anus

>>7068574
I'd fucking love to insert my penis into her puckered anus.

>>7068471
Kids crushing on his enemy.


cute.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Soxygirl22?cf=regular

my nemesis. OPs message sent

Guys, I kind of want to have sex with my nemesis.

I have yet to make him aware of my knowledge of his status as my true arch-enemy.

>>7068574

shit, she sounds awesome, link to profile?

>>7068678
Just tell him how you feel. If it works, it works. I wish you all the best.

>>7068574

Want to hit, so hard. I'd let her eat my meat if you know what I mean.

>>7068678
And so the line is drawn.

>>7068867

Are you fucking dumb? Her name is right there.

Thanks r9k. I sent off 10 messages today to people I found on okcupid. I think these messages will brighten each of their days.

Plus, I've been in a conversation with OP's arch nemesis.

>>7068652
Her evil knows no bounds, she is trying to break my resolve, but I won't let her have the satisfaction... ugh but she is kinda cute in a, I hate you kinda way. Curses!

Do the bump-a-bump

bumpblox

>>7069161

i preffer to copy and paste a link instead of searching for her name there, deal with it bitch

>>7069309

>Plus, I've been in a conversation with OP's arch nemesis.

OP here. I have returned.
You'd better not have harmed the delicate balance of the hunter-hunted relationship. I haven't gotten a reply from him yet.

Can someone archive this? THIS IS EPIC

OP here.
I'm very happy with you all. This thread is awesome. My nemesis hasn't gotten in touch yet. But when he does, I'll make another thread.

Also, lol'd heartily at >>7065842

doublebumpan

widdly widdly

Right here is the perfect example of what this board should be. OP, I salute you.

Keep up the good work, soldiers.

No reply from mine yet.
I live in hope.

Maybe I'll have to pretend to be the villain this time.

good enough?

" Greetings,
i haven't really read your profile but all i know is that your my arch enemy and i feel we must battle to the death for the right of better human/villain. I feel that we must battle due to you being a person that is pretty much 50% at everything and that is just plain greedy on both our parts and i can't have that for reason i do not know but it can not happen!

after the battle we have people will know of what happened and Anonymous would look back on this as the birth of the OKCupid serial killer that tracked down his anti matches and executed them while wearing a multi coloured wetsuit and wrestling mask and that masked person will be me don't ask why i need to wear the clothing but i feel its right for our battle!

to prepare for battle we need a time and place, i recommend that going to a wood were no one will know what we are doing and if people do find or stumble upon us we can pretend to be acting or role-playing which ever is more believable. after that i'll put on my wetsuit and begin the battle. i must have a practice stab before we have our real battle and if you die before we have a real battle then i'll count the real thing as a draw and bury you in a mud pit along with your clothing and maybe a flower anyway reply soon so that we can meet up and battle!

Your truly,

Corgylegs,
Wetsuit killer. "

>>7063202

This guy is my enemy too!

>>7070558

The /co/ version of this thread had people with him as an enemy, too.
He's a real megalomaniac. Enemy of the people.

Bump. I need more threatening letters.

Ba-bump.
Where'd everybody go?

OP, any response from your nemesis yet?

Bumping to keep this on the front page so OP can see it and REPLY

This thread still alive?

Fuck yeah, awesome.

>>7062978
My enemy!

He has replied!

The cards have been set. The ball is in my park.

My worst enemy is wearing a cowboy hat and is from Texas... I better bring plenty of gun for this one. Although, I'm sure he isn't going to get the joke.... which makes me sad.

>>7075139
And my reply.

This just became awesome!

bumpofepicproportionsblox

bumpofepicproportionsbloxbloxbloxblox

>>7075404
Awesome, can't wait for the admins to get involved.

>>7062649
Isn't her third picture Leah Dizon?

Wat

i am in a total state of lulz right now

>>7075637
I know right? It's getting better by the minute!

I applaude you all!


Aprovebloxing.

OP: You are right now my favorite person.

I'm seriously considering creating an OKCupid account just for the sole purpose of finding my enemy.

Apparently I hate asexuals: http://www.okcupid.com/profile?u=swankivy

I didn't know there were any on OKC.

98% Enemy

I am a selfish prick, good looking, successful, toned body, young enough to do it and old enough to do it right. I don't smoke and am lots of fun. I don't have time for petty drama or emotional hysterics. Also, I am intelligent and well educated and don't care what anybody else thinks of me. I do what I want, when I want and you've probably figured that out already. What I'm looking for: If I had to write a newspaper personal it would look something like this: Handsome, cultured, intellectual with a big****and marathon tongue in cheek seeks beautiful woman in long term committed relationship for purposes of making boyfriend/husband insanely jealous for purposes of securing diamonds, jaguars and new home in prestigious area or beach front property. Multi orgasm training included at no extra charge.

This seems about right.

>>7076009

lol wow.

I don't even know.

>>7075139
>>7075404
Watch out! He might report you to the AUTHURITIES!

I've messaged my nemesis.

He's from fucking Michigan, the bastard.

GRR.

>>7076070
Gaghguhg cannot read that text

>>7076009
>>7076019
Thats so funny.
He would fit in here.

>>7076070

Picture sucks, here's a copypaste.

Subject: Your Imminent Destruction.

Mr. kharris51,

It is time for these pretenses to be abandoned. I have lived for too long under your tyrannous reign, limited always by your diabolic schemes. My cars refusal to start in cold weather, my books of choice being in a perpetual state of checked-outness in the local library, the temperamental nature of my internet connection; I had thought, before, that such things were merely the result of bad luck. In my naivety I had believed them coincidence - but now I know better. Through OkCupid's easy and intuitive matchmaking service, I have finally unearthed your identity. Is it mere coincidence that you bear a 99% enemy rating? I think not. You may believe yourself safe in the faraway land of Michigan, 350 miles away, but know this: I come for you. Enjoy your typical Friday night spent watching a movie at home or playing online games, for it may be your last. You have plotted in secret for too long, and now it must end.

Let the final battle commence.

4chan is all about wading through shit to find gold. This is that gold. Pure gold.

>>7062145
>because the time for laughter is over.
This is the best thread that has happened here in a long time. Although, due to weed I have nooo idea how to fuck my ok account. I hate it anyways.
in b4lrn toooo reed fuck that

>I am going to fight you until one of us is dead.

Brilliant. This thread has brought tears of laughter into my eyes.

My archenemy is a bi Latino who dresses/talks like a thug and is really intent on experimenting with a dude online. He's a Scorpio, but it doesn't matter.

If he's just some sexually confused vato, I'd like him to meet the man of his dreams. I'd say some gaybot should do him a favor and message him, but I think this could be a trap. Does my combination of caution and helpfulness towards even my mortal enemy make me the clear hero?

Still, I wear black often, can go off on weird rants and consider myself a misunderstood genius, so maybe I'm just an occasionally good villain, like Magneto.

THEY FEEL HE IS A SCHOLAR

>>7076188
Awwww, that's adorably weird. He shouldn't be your enemy, he is a scholar.

>>7076188
lol this guy is my 98% enemy too

he seems like a nice guy though

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Arlee4u?cf=regular

>>7076227
A husband? Really?

>>7075139
Ahahahaahahahahaahhahaahaahaahahahahahaha

>>7076188
BEWARE EVERYBODY

THEY FASHION HIM TO BE AN INTELLECTUAL

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/kungfumike?cf=regular
Goddamn I have a fight on my hands... this guy knows Kung Fu.

99% enemy. I don't hate him based of his profile though.

My enemy seems quite capable indeed.

>>7076275

This is what I have sent him.

Ah, I've found the motherfucker.

"i am a 19 yr old male. i love all activities that are outdoors. i am a firefighter. i stant about 5'7" and 140 lbs. i am very fit to muscular.i have 3 tattoos on my arms. i plan on getting a couple more you nobody will be able to see them if i wear a short sleeve shirt. softball and baseball are my favorite outdoor sports. i love to hunt, camp, fish and hike. i help my little brother out with his lacrosse team and running skills. i am usually laid back a lot of people would call it lazy."

Fucking jock asshole.

This thread has not been saged once and there are 300 posts...awesome.

>>7076297
Doesn't sound like an asshole, but his writing isn't great.

bamapuh!

>>7076169
Ugh, Georgia. All of my irl nemeses seem to come from Georgia.

So, if these are out enemies, is the Secret League of Robots on the side of good, or evil?

OP HAS YOUR NEMESIS RESPONDED I MUST KNOW

This is the perfect activity for /r9k/

Threatening people you don't like!

>>7076461
>Threatening people you don't like online

Fixed it for ya

>>7076420

Maybe PhillyBoy bested the OP. ;__;

>>7076703
Damn you, Xander! You have taken away what is most precious to us for the last time!

This is war!

Uh oh, I found too now someone up there in the enemy rating from Tucson. Some serious shit is going on there.

>>7077282
I swear, Tuscon, Arizona is where our enemies lie. There is a large citadel of evil there, where our most hated enemies converge to talk about their nefarious plans and laugh maniacally at our misfortunes.

OP here. Almost a full day since I laid down the gauntlet, and the coward has done nought but stare at it where it fell. There on the floor.
He hasn't logged in since the 10th.
I still have high hopes, though.

>>7075139
>>7075404

This is fucking boss.
I love how you haven't explained what's actually going on, and he hasn't bothered to ask. Like he already knows what you're getting at.
He's the one.

>>7077707
Try seeking lesser opponents first, bro. Maybe you must prove your worth against a gauntlet of lesser men until he deems you worthy of his prowess.

>>7077718

Well I really wonder about the effect I'm having on his villainy. I mean, yesterday I had no delays on the train, and though I forgot my book there was a newspaper on my seat. My cold cleared up. My ex girlfriend let me have sex with her.
Have I come on too strong? Is he gone?

... the fuck.

IS THIS THREAD AUTOSAGING?!

>>7077765
Maybe he's trying to catch you off-guard, and when you think he's gone, BAM!

You're stuck in traffic for five days with a cold while your ex bites your cock while receiving a blowjob, and you get arrested for having sex in a car.

>>7077788

That fucking bastard! I'll show him not to mess with my traffic.
Thanks for the heads up.

>>7077838
We gotta look out for each other, bro.

You never know... where he could be.

Also maybe someone should make a new thread, I feel this one's on its way out.

this evil looking bastard 100% enemy status for me.
the strange thing is, reading his profile, he seems to have stolen my personality.

>>7077922

The ultimate offence.

>>7077922
He is your doppelganger.

Kill him before he kills you.

bump. cannot let this thread die

Is the thread looking like it's autosaging for anyone else?

>>7078249
Its OKCupid nemesis must be attacking!

>>7078283
Our nemeses from Tuscon have made their move!

We must make ours! We must besiege Tuscon!

>>7078303
>implying we can be assed to go out to tuscon

So if Tucson is the enemy of r9k, where is our spiritual homeland?

LIVE YOU BASTARD
LIVE

Can someone explain to me why this thread is autosaging?
Isn't this the best thread in forever? Why is a camwhore thread still bumping on the first page?